Taking the Want or Taking the Need

THE DILEMMA: Want vs. Need

I guess the first question you’re asking yourself is

WHY?

Why am I watching this?

Why am I here?

The answer is simple. Well kinda simple anyways…

College is an education. It’s something that nowadays we’re born and bred to do. The idea is a relatively simple one. Get good grades, go to a great college, get a high paying job, and file into a monotonous lifestyle that makes the capitalist world go around.

But I’m getting ahead of myself. Let’s backtrack a bit here. No we were talking about getting good grades. Making the grades. Now what does that mean. In one word: STRESS. The stress of making the grade and making it to the top. In high school, we barely know who we are. Let alone who we might become. But we’re told “work hard and become a doctor or a lawyer. Otherwise you’ll be flipping some burgers.

So you make sacrifices. You don’t hang out with your friends on Friday night because you want that 3.5 for the semester. Then you don’t take Art because a computer class makes you a more well rounded candidate. This is the beginning of the end. Well not really. But close enough.

College comes around and you have this great school you’ve gotten into.

So what the fuck do you do now?

Some students shop around for majors, milking the word “undecided” for as long as possible. Others aim big taking on Chemistry classes and sophisticated Business classes. But then they see this bright goal out on the horizon. A measure of hope in it’s grasp. “What is it?” You ask. It’s a skill. Something that’s been pushed to the back of your mind and you see that class. The question is: do you take it?

Inspiration

When things become a maze of confusion in reality there is always one thing that you can turn to to get through: Music.

I know it sounds corny and unbelievable but music is something that can touch you so deep that you can't even separate your thoughts from it. Music has the power to change lives and make you think of the world in a different context.

I can honestly say that I love making music. I love singing along to songs on the radio, I love opening up the windows and singing loud enough for the people two floors below to hear! I love playing (badly) along with my guitar. I don't think that life my life would be the same without MUSIC.

I wake up in the morning and the first logical thing that pops into my head is a song. I'll be in class and the professor will say something that resembles lyrics and that entire day I am singing that song softly to myself, waiting impatiently until I can listen to it when I get back to my room. 

So for me, you can see how hard it is not to get to fully explore my love for creating music. When you feel like you have music in your soul and you have to settle for something that gives you a better opportunity to succeed, it hurts. 

That's why next semester I want to focus my Capstone presentation on something that explores not only this side of my life, but focuses on the way that this dilemma affects all college students. I want to take this idea and create a documentary of sorts. I know that it's going to be a handful, but I think that this is something I need to do before I move on to a school where my primary focus is going to be on my writing.

I need to let that side take a little bit more of my life before it becomes consumed by the worlds that I will spin with my words when I finally start focusing on my novels.